So is it at all possible that we can regain innocence?
or am I confusing innocence with sincerity?
You know children are by far the most innocent and honest beings we know.
But then...
its the elderly.
Yes, the elderly they are so innoncent in ways.
They are as small and fragile as children, and everything is new to them.
Idk. I just was wondering, had anyone else noticed that?
I just came from my neighbors house.
An elderly couple, the man is in a wheel chair I remember him before
he found himself there.
I love them, =) they have always been good to me.
But today something wierd happend.
See my neighbor Mrs. B went up to her room to get a card for my mother,
obviously this leaves me alone with Mr.B.
Fragile Mr. B whom I watch quietly, streatching his arm out in attempts to reach out
and get a cup of water.
As he did so he continuesly mumbled under his breath or so I thought.
He then begain speaking aloud to me.
"I'm tired of living." he calmly stated after reciting his date of birth to me.
"You're tired of living?" I mumbled in return.
"Yes, I'm just...tired of it all. My body isn't what it used to be." he stared off.
"And there you sit, you 16 year olds are so beautiful." he smiled then shut his eyes
in a manner that said he was in a battle with what would soon become sleep.
"Thank You." I whispered so low I doubt he'd heard me.
Once he opened his eyes again, and looked past me, like he was looking at
a younger version of himself in the doorway.
His face was calm.
And you know what, as wierd as this all may sound
I think that was a very beautiful moment. Something worth freaking
out about of course, but its like this, when he does I REALLY know he wasn't
in pain or anything.
He was just calm.
He ended the conversation with "I should find someone to talk to" and smiled.
I smiled in return.
It was so nice.
Depressing, but nice if only you all could have seen his face change in thought.
Innocence is beauty.
And I believe it is only once we are older that our innocence returns.
Or maybe its only then that our sincerity returns, I'm not really sure anymore.
Point is , if it is innocence it comes in a more refined and wise manor.
And as young "beautiful" people, we should be more happy about the lives we lead.
And if we aren't well then its plenty we need to work on right?
Either way, take note of how you LIVE.
Because don't YOU want to be the one who has lived a life that holds so much joy
that you can say "I'm tired"?
I do.
Many people say I still have my child like innocence, and in ways they are right.
But when its all gone, I'd like to have the refined version.
=)
xp
xoxo,
Lainey.
